"A city is empty if you don't have friends to make you feel at home", someone once told me. I didn't realise that till many years later.
I have been in London, New York, Paris, Toronto, Hongkong, Tokyo, Taipei, Beijing and Shanghai and they all meant nothing to me if not for the people I knew. Even Singapore which I call home is sometimes as lonely as can be if I was just wandering around, aimlessly. Or Bali for that matter, the jewel of every tourist in the world. Maybe that's one of the reasons why I'd stopped traveling to see new places unless I have friends in those places.
In a nutshell: Cities are cold. It's the people in the cities who provide the warmth.
I'm not talking about the tourist or backpacker who wanders around as an "alien" in any city, chatting with anyone who obliges - for they're easy to find or come by. But these "aliens" don't normally or are not likely to come with the true warmth of any city. I'm talking about people who can actually make us feel "welcomed" beyond the smiles you see replicated in the umpteen tourism ads on TV every where. I'm talking about people who are warm blooded, who make you feel the warmth in a city, any city.
I really don't blame the tourism ads; expounding their lands of smiles etc., for there are many who seek that promise of warmth - be they superficial or otherwise. Rather I feel that they're smart, for marketing a city with smiles is the first step in getting lonely souls (or potentially lonely souls) to make the effort and expense to go there and - hopefully - seek and find the companionship which will make them less lonely.
Companionship - that's an often forgotten word. But that word means more and more when one matures toward our twilight years.
I don't believe that true companionship can be found overnight (it's not one-night-stands I'm talking about either). Companionship has to be nurtured, understood, cherished, and more. But no one interpretes those criteria in that strict sense anymore. Hence, I can see why and how companionship is hard to come by yet people easily part with large sums of monies to get to where that promise of companionship appear to be -- helped along by the advertising people who have clients to please and whose salaries and bonuses depend on how they can "sell" those destinations to (gullible) tourists. "Land of smile"; "Land of dreams"; "Exotic Asia"; Exotic Africa" or exotic anywhere for that matter. They are all but adjectives if one doesn't have friends or cannot find the all important companionship in those destinations.
Upon further reflection, who cares? We all live in such a serious world that we're not about to spend a few days with someone from a foreign land and suddenly take him or her to be a "true" friend or companion. We all live in a superficial world anyway. If this guy or gal gives you the sense that you are "at home" and you are "among peers", we fall prey. For we don't have the time to look for the truth nor have the wish to seek the truth. So let it be - as the Beatles put it so well in their song.
That's the easy part, seemingly. My problem is that everytime I return to reality from one of those "feel good", "enjoyment of pseudo companionship" trips in a foreign land, I feel like a sucker who's sold my soul along with my feelings and emotions to people unworthy of my effort, and the money spent,of course.
But when I think hard enough, those are the realities of life - we needed companionship and the guys/gals who are out there to provide exactly what we needed are opportunists - who happened to be there at the right time and the right place. In a way, I feel like all of us are like birds with clipped wings lying in the comfort of the rescuer/samaritan who provides the warmth and medical attention we so dearly needed.
Hence the next time we feel we're at a lost, just think of ourselves as that bird with clipped wings and never let our pride overcome us by resisting that rescuer/samaritan who might be able to put us in the right place and perspective again.
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
Sunday, December 21, 2008
Dealing with different people in our lives
We meet and have to deal with all sorts of people in our lives
There are those who grasp matters the 1st time, and there are those who are born not to grasp!
There are people who've been doing a certain job yet have all sorts of problems trying to understand what efficiency and reliability is about in the job they're doing. What happens in their work life will likely mirror in their personal and married lives - a mess, for want of a better word. How would you rate someone who can't even tell the difference between a screwdriver and a spanner and what those tools are supposed to be used for?
There are those who are good with words but falter when they have to act on their words. They are likely to have lots of plans and solutions to everything they're involved in. But all those plans and solutions are only good on paper, or in this day and edge, on the computer screen be it a Powerpoint or Keynote presentation or some other software more complex or task specific than the norm. When one tries to put those plans or solutions on the (real) ground or battlefield, nothing seems to work like they're supposed to. These people are likely to come up with a plan or solution and not bother to "debug" them thoroughly, like what newly written software ought to be.
Then there are those who are fond of chasing rainbows, rather than appreciate the rainbow right in front of them, where they are standing! They have lofty dreams, lofty approaches to how things can be done, always thinking about and conjuring the most ideal scenario when that ideal scenario could be arrived at by just appreciating where they are, harnessing the resources at their disposal, and doing something about what they are supposed to be doing.
But we need all of these people to make this world, for otherwise would have been a boring world not worth living for the myriad of personalities He created.
So, what can pragmatic people like us do and how do we deal with these people? Patience. Perseverance. Believing in what we feel is achievable. Commit ourselves to something which will bear results rather than looking out for that rainbow which leads nowhere. When all these people come together and respect each others' respective strengths and weaknesses and work to balance out one another, we have a success story in the making.
There are those who grasp matters the 1st time, and there are those who are born not to grasp!
There are people who've been doing a certain job yet have all sorts of problems trying to understand what efficiency and reliability is about in the job they're doing. What happens in their work life will likely mirror in their personal and married lives - a mess, for want of a better word. How would you rate someone who can't even tell the difference between a screwdriver and a spanner and what those tools are supposed to be used for?
There are those who are good with words but falter when they have to act on their words. They are likely to have lots of plans and solutions to everything they're involved in. But all those plans and solutions are only good on paper, or in this day and edge, on the computer screen be it a Powerpoint or Keynote presentation or some other software more complex or task specific than the norm. When one tries to put those plans or solutions on the (real) ground or battlefield, nothing seems to work like they're supposed to. These people are likely to come up with a plan or solution and not bother to "debug" them thoroughly, like what newly written software ought to be.
Then there are those who are fond of chasing rainbows, rather than appreciate the rainbow right in front of them, where they are standing! They have lofty dreams, lofty approaches to how things can be done, always thinking about and conjuring the most ideal scenario when that ideal scenario could be arrived at by just appreciating where they are, harnessing the resources at their disposal, and doing something about what they are supposed to be doing.
But we need all of these people to make this world, for otherwise would have been a boring world not worth living for the myriad of personalities He created.
So, what can pragmatic people like us do and how do we deal with these people? Patience. Perseverance. Believing in what we feel is achievable. Commit ourselves to something which will bear results rather than looking out for that rainbow which leads nowhere. When all these people come together and respect each others' respective strengths and weaknesses and work to balance out one another, we have a success story in the making.
Wednesday, December 17, 2008
Leaders vs followers
Just had the privilege to read some wise words forwarded to me via email. How refreshing to hear that there are people out there who look forward to doing things with what they have rather than complaining about what they don't. They make the best of what they have and await the unexpected. I don't think they should be considered passive, in fact they are pro-active to me. Pro-active in the sense that they DO things with available means and tools. These are the leaders as far as I am concerned.
We had a new software installed for evaluation in the office and from how everyone reacted, I already managed to pick out the leaders from the followers. The leaders were so eager to learn, so eager to see what else they can get out of the software, and so pleased that they have a new tool to help them with what they're doing. The followers, or rather losers, are the ones who complain about what that software can't do, about how they need to go the roundabout ways to do certain tasks, and how slow it is. And they all failed to see which aspects that software has made their lives easier.
It's similar in what's facing us in life right now, in the face of this global economic crisis.
The leaders will look at the constraints and limitations this crisis has brought about to their normal lives, they will look for opportunities such as how they can utilise the downturn to streamline their operations, make more efficient use of their time and resources, and how else they can use their time to improve, innovate and prepare for the upturn. The followers and losers will spend most of their time whinging about how the downturn has affected their lives, what they're having to live or do without, their sacrifices and blah blah blah.. Are you one of them? Or are you more than that?
During the 1997 financial crisis in Asia, I can remember telling the rest of my staff and peers to watch the rebound. We upgraded, we re-trained, we survived the crisis, we earned respect from our staff and vendors and so on.... And true enough, when the rebound struck us, we were one of the few who were prepared for the work which overwhelmed the industry and caught others unprepared. We retained all the basic infrastructure albeit scaled down somewhat, we retained most of our capable and competent staff and most of all, we retained the mindset which enabled us to handle the rebound.
This is also true about life. I've had my ups and downs. When I'm down, I sob a little like any human would (unless you're in a Hollywood movie), worry a little, get stressed up quite a lot, BUT I also found time to learn from the lessons which caused the "down" and reminisce those moments which I enjoyed during the "ups". I also found time to learn more, improve myself, and adapted my mindset to perpetual ups and downs which I'll meet in my life.
Life's worth living they say! I can't see how that can be disputed.
We had a new software installed for evaluation in the office and from how everyone reacted, I already managed to pick out the leaders from the followers. The leaders were so eager to learn, so eager to see what else they can get out of the software, and so pleased that they have a new tool to help them with what they're doing. The followers, or rather losers, are the ones who complain about what that software can't do, about how they need to go the roundabout ways to do certain tasks, and how slow it is. And they all failed to see which aspects that software has made their lives easier.
It's similar in what's facing us in life right now, in the face of this global economic crisis.
The leaders will look at the constraints and limitations this crisis has brought about to their normal lives, they will look for opportunities such as how they can utilise the downturn to streamline their operations, make more efficient use of their time and resources, and how else they can use their time to improve, innovate and prepare for the upturn. The followers and losers will spend most of their time whinging about how the downturn has affected their lives, what they're having to live or do without, their sacrifices and blah blah blah.. Are you one of them? Or are you more than that?
During the 1997 financial crisis in Asia, I can remember telling the rest of my staff and peers to watch the rebound. We upgraded, we re-trained, we survived the crisis, we earned respect from our staff and vendors and so on.... And true enough, when the rebound struck us, we were one of the few who were prepared for the work which overwhelmed the industry and caught others unprepared. We retained all the basic infrastructure albeit scaled down somewhat, we retained most of our capable and competent staff and most of all, we retained the mindset which enabled us to handle the rebound.
This is also true about life. I've had my ups and downs. When I'm down, I sob a little like any human would (unless you're in a Hollywood movie), worry a little, get stressed up quite a lot, BUT I also found time to learn from the lessons which caused the "down" and reminisce those moments which I enjoyed during the "ups". I also found time to learn more, improve myself, and adapted my mindset to perpetual ups and downs which I'll meet in my life.
Life's worth living they say! I can't see how that can be disputed.
Friday, December 12, 2008
X'mas again
Tis the time for X'mas celebrations again! Lunches, dinners, drinks, get togethers of all sorts...
Friends got together today for a X'mas luncheon starting with champagne at 11. It must have been a 5 or 6 hour lunch which ended up at one of our favourite watering holes thereafter. All seems to have been forgotten during this time abyss today -- by the time everyone crawled onto the comfort of their beds.
It's a culture of sorts to have long X'mas luncheons; and the Westerners have lived it up even though they're in Asia. Before we get into November, plannings and bookings would already have been underway for the early birds will get the best choices of restaurants and the best deals. It's a kind of reward for the year's hard work which everyone is deemed to have put in, especially in a tough year like this has been. I wonder what the bankers are doing in New York and how they're going about their traditional long and expensive luncheons.
My guess is that the bulk of their discussions would have been on how to pay themselves fat bonuses without raising the ire of taxpayers and government officials who are using taxpayers' money to bail their banks out of the mess created by their mismanagement. And I wonder how many of those taxpayers can afford to savour the Dom Perignons that this bankers down in their celebratory X'mas dos. In George Orwell's Animal Farm, there're words to the effect that all men are equals but some are more equal than others. Perhaps Orwell saw something which we are only beginning to realize.
Friends got together today for a X'mas luncheon starting with champagne at 11. It must have been a 5 or 6 hour lunch which ended up at one of our favourite watering holes thereafter. All seems to have been forgotten during this time abyss today -- by the time everyone crawled onto the comfort of their beds.
It's a culture of sorts to have long X'mas luncheons; and the Westerners have lived it up even though they're in Asia. Before we get into November, plannings and bookings would already have been underway for the early birds will get the best choices of restaurants and the best deals. It's a kind of reward for the year's hard work which everyone is deemed to have put in, especially in a tough year like this has been. I wonder what the bankers are doing in New York and how they're going about their traditional long and expensive luncheons.
My guess is that the bulk of their discussions would have been on how to pay themselves fat bonuses without raising the ire of taxpayers and government officials who are using taxpayers' money to bail their banks out of the mess created by their mismanagement. And I wonder how many of those taxpayers can afford to savour the Dom Perignons that this bankers down in their celebratory X'mas dos. In George Orwell's Animal Farm, there're words to the effect that all men are equals but some are more equal than others. Perhaps Orwell saw something which we are only beginning to realize.
Friday, November 28, 2008
Poor Thais
I have nothing but sympathy for the people of this supposedly peaceful, predominantly Buddhist kingdom
First they (the Bangkok elite) cannot tolerate a good Prime Minister (Thaksin) who cares for the poor so much so that they instigate the army and support a coup d'etat. OK he may have mixed business with politics, but that must surely be a case of the pot calling the kettle black for I can't imagine a Thai politician who's in politics with the sole purpose of serving his/her fellow countrymen. There's always a hidden agenda somewhere and this normally starts from a hunger for power and recognition, evolving into business propositions from people around them, and inevitably leading to some form of corruption, collusion or cronyism.
In the so called affluent Western world, this is not dissimilar to the work of lobbyists, and politicians laying the ground for campaign funds at the next election - its not called corruption or cronyism. Look at what happened to Bush and Cheney and their relationship with oil giants. Here in the East, it's called corruption and cronyism, plus nepotism in the words of the Indonesians.
"One man one vote" is just not good enough for the urban elite in Bangkok and surrounds. Farmers are deemed "children of a lesser God" and don't deserve to have the equal vote that the "intellect and elite" have
So why did the security apparatus and the army in Thailand let these PAD bandits and bullies run amok to the extent of isolating Bangkok from the outside world and inconveniencing tourists by closing their airport? Doesn't this smell of collaboration? Doesn't this suggest that some "high power" up there is tacitly supporting the bullies and bandits who wear yellow purportedly in support of the King. This high power is so powerful, for otherwise the PAD movement would not have rendered the army and police ineffective. How should the monarch feel when bandits and bullies further their crimes under the auspices of loyalty to the monarch?
They asked for Prime Minister Samak to resign when they occupied government house in Bangkok. Samak resigned but they didn't disperse from government house. Now they want replacement Prime Minister Somchai to resign and the government to step down. Who's going to govern if the government steps down? They, the PAD who's holding the country at ransom even though the government is a democratically elected one?
When I was in Bangkok during the Thaksin era, a lot of the established business people dislike Thaksin openly. The cushy contracts and relationships they had with the "old school" politicians suddenly disappeared in the face of billionaire Thaksin and his business empire. It's not unlike the Suharto kids in Indonesia - before the children grew up, business deals were spread out "quite equally" among Suharto loyalists under a "somewhat successful" patronage system; but when the children grew up and entered the business world, the best deals were snatched up by the Cendana family leaving the "bones" for the others.
How can Thais get out of this quagmire.
Maybe they need a strong Prime Minister like Thaksin to come back and resolve this once and for all - through negotiations and diplomacy. Thaksin must have learnt his mistakes by now - maybe he isolated the powerful elites so badly that they have but one aim and that is to put him out of power. The person who's so instrumental in reshaping the country and giving the rural folks a breathe of fresh air may have moved too fast for the urban folks to accept. I'm quite sure that a smart person like Thaksin will not make the same mistakes, IF given a second chance.
If only Indonesia has the same strong willed and committed leader in next year's elections. Rural Indonesians, perhaps even all Indonesians will be able to breathe the same fresh air Thaksin provided to the rural Thais - corrupt officials who pilfer from education and welfare funds for the poor excluded, of course.
First they (the Bangkok elite) cannot tolerate a good Prime Minister (Thaksin) who cares for the poor so much so that they instigate the army and support a coup d'etat. OK he may have mixed business with politics, but that must surely be a case of the pot calling the kettle black for I can't imagine a Thai politician who's in politics with the sole purpose of serving his/her fellow countrymen. There's always a hidden agenda somewhere and this normally starts from a hunger for power and recognition, evolving into business propositions from people around them, and inevitably leading to some form of corruption, collusion or cronyism.
In the so called affluent Western world, this is not dissimilar to the work of lobbyists, and politicians laying the ground for campaign funds at the next election - its not called corruption or cronyism. Look at what happened to Bush and Cheney and their relationship with oil giants. Here in the East, it's called corruption and cronyism, plus nepotism in the words of the Indonesians.
"One man one vote" is just not good enough for the urban elite in Bangkok and surrounds. Farmers are deemed "children of a lesser God" and don't deserve to have the equal vote that the "intellect and elite" have
So why did the security apparatus and the army in Thailand let these PAD bandits and bullies run amok to the extent of isolating Bangkok from the outside world and inconveniencing tourists by closing their airport? Doesn't this smell of collaboration? Doesn't this suggest that some "high power" up there is tacitly supporting the bullies and bandits who wear yellow purportedly in support of the King. This high power is so powerful, for otherwise the PAD movement would not have rendered the army and police ineffective. How should the monarch feel when bandits and bullies further their crimes under the auspices of loyalty to the monarch?
They asked for Prime Minister Samak to resign when they occupied government house in Bangkok. Samak resigned but they didn't disperse from government house. Now they want replacement Prime Minister Somchai to resign and the government to step down. Who's going to govern if the government steps down? They, the PAD who's holding the country at ransom even though the government is a democratically elected one?
When I was in Bangkok during the Thaksin era, a lot of the established business people dislike Thaksin openly. The cushy contracts and relationships they had with the "old school" politicians suddenly disappeared in the face of billionaire Thaksin and his business empire. It's not unlike the Suharto kids in Indonesia - before the children grew up, business deals were spread out "quite equally" among Suharto loyalists under a "somewhat successful" patronage system; but when the children grew up and entered the business world, the best deals were snatched up by the Cendana family leaving the "bones" for the others.
How can Thais get out of this quagmire.
Maybe they need a strong Prime Minister like Thaksin to come back and resolve this once and for all - through negotiations and diplomacy. Thaksin must have learnt his mistakes by now - maybe he isolated the powerful elites so badly that they have but one aim and that is to put him out of power. The person who's so instrumental in reshaping the country and giving the rural folks a breathe of fresh air may have moved too fast for the urban folks to accept. I'm quite sure that a smart person like Thaksin will not make the same mistakes, IF given a second chance.
If only Indonesia has the same strong willed and committed leader in next year's elections. Rural Indonesians, perhaps even all Indonesians will be able to breathe the same fresh air Thaksin provided to the rural Thais - corrupt officials who pilfer from education and welfare funds for the poor excluded, of course.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Strange world in difficult times
This is indeed where are now. Failing banks; falling markets; felled regimes... Where is mankind headed, I wonder?
The good news.
We have a new US President who has to tackle the current crisis.
World commodity prices has fallen so inflationary pressures will not come from scarce commodities at least in the next 18 to 24 months.
All countries are coming together to get us out of this quagmire.
China is doing something to "jump shock" their economy.
we can all
The BAD BAD news
Recession, recession, recession
No signs that confidence is rebuilding in credit markets.
Putin and Russia has not said what it plans to do to get his country and the world back on track.
Europe is united yet divided still.
Pirates off Somalia are creating havoc to shipping, and hence stifling trade and raising costs/inflation.
Tell me more ....
The good news.
We have a new US President who has to tackle the current crisis.
World commodity prices has fallen so inflationary pressures will not come from scarce commodities at least in the next 18 to 24 months.
All countries are coming together to get us out of this quagmire.
China is doing something to "jump shock" their economy.
we can all
The BAD BAD news
Recession, recession, recession
No signs that confidence is rebuilding in credit markets.
Putin and Russia has not said what it plans to do to get his country and the world back on track.
Europe is united yet divided still.
Pirates off Somalia are creating havoc to shipping, and hence stifling trade and raising costs/inflation.
Tell me more ....
Sunday, October 19, 2008
Asia's young democracies
News out of Thailand and Malaysia are hoarding the headlines now; soon it will be Indonesia when they move into election fever in 2009. All these point to the fact that most countries in Asia are still going through a young and immature democracy.
Thailand has been notorious for their coups d'etat for as long as people can remember. Malaysia is slightly different in that the Barisan Nasional has been a stabilizing force in the country made up of diversified ethnic groups, until their General Elections in March 2008. From developments so far, the populace seem to be "fed up" with the pro-Malay/bumiputera policies which survived Malaysian politics up until now. The feeling on the ground, it seems, is that the pro-Malay policies are responsible for the culture of cronyism, nepotism and corruption in Malaysia which Indonesia - referred to as KKN in their own language - is trying to shed .
Malaysian politics is based on a patronage system not unlike the Indonesian system under the late President Suharto. Sort of an old boys' network not dissimilar to what's common in the UK, USA and Canada and other western countries. The difference in the affluent West is that they try and be as accountable as possible, save for the way the Bush administration appointed their security contractors in Iraq. In Malaysia, it's very different; for the government seem to award projects like they were "distributing the spoils", the way warlords or conquerors in history, east and west, used to do to reward their loyal subjects who helped them win territories.
Thailand is unique as the elite failed to deliver voter numbers to ensure that the party they support wins the election. Its probably arrogance which allowed Thaksin and his party to win over the greater numbers from the rural poor compared to elitists in the capital and major cities. The Indonesian politicians are better at this, knowing how to spread their campaign efforts over the areas where the numbers count. That's why I feel that the Thai elites who want to control Thailand are really arrogant.
Of all the democracies in Asia, Thailand is probably worst off. Malaysia a close second. The Philippines is too corrupt to count and Singapore's "managed democracy" probably doesn't fall into that league - and Singapore's leaders don't want to be in the same league of "western styled" democracies anyway. That leaves Indonesia, which is probably the closest to the western definition of "democracy" as we can get, not that it is the best form of governance for such a diversified country like Indonesia for now. But I'm sure that with a lot of hard work, the Indonesians will find the equilibrium on a democracy which works for their country, assuming there are enough politicians committed to the secular approach as the best way forward for their country in the next generation.
Thailand has been notorious for their coups d'etat for as long as people can remember. Malaysia is slightly different in that the Barisan Nasional has been a stabilizing force in the country made up of diversified ethnic groups, until their General Elections in March 2008. From developments so far, the populace seem to be "fed up" with the pro-Malay/bumiputera policies which survived Malaysian politics up until now. The feeling on the ground, it seems, is that the pro-Malay policies are responsible for the culture of cronyism, nepotism and corruption in Malaysia which Indonesia - referred to as KKN in their own language - is trying to shed .
Malaysian politics is based on a patronage system not unlike the Indonesian system under the late President Suharto. Sort of an old boys' network not dissimilar to what's common in the UK, USA and Canada and other western countries. The difference in the affluent West is that they try and be as accountable as possible, save for the way the Bush administration appointed their security contractors in Iraq. In Malaysia, it's very different; for the government seem to award projects like they were "distributing the spoils", the way warlords or conquerors in history, east and west, used to do to reward their loyal subjects who helped them win territories.
Thailand is unique as the elite failed to deliver voter numbers to ensure that the party they support wins the election. Its probably arrogance which allowed Thaksin and his party to win over the greater numbers from the rural poor compared to elitists in the capital and major cities. The Indonesian politicians are better at this, knowing how to spread their campaign efforts over the areas where the numbers count. That's why I feel that the Thai elites who want to control Thailand are really arrogant.
Of all the democracies in Asia, Thailand is probably worst off. Malaysia a close second. The Philippines is too corrupt to count and Singapore's "managed democracy" probably doesn't fall into that league - and Singapore's leaders don't want to be in the same league of "western styled" democracies anyway. That leaves Indonesia, which is probably the closest to the western definition of "democracy" as we can get, not that it is the best form of governance for such a diversified country like Indonesia for now. But I'm sure that with a lot of hard work, the Indonesians will find the equilibrium on a democracy which works for their country, assuming there are enough politicians committed to the secular approach as the best way forward for their country in the next generation.
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